A Date with my Subconscious Mind

Yesterday I had the Best dating experience

It was a Union of my soul

Marriage of lifetimes

Sacred meeting that gives height to the Highest level of ecstacy Nirvana

I had a date with my Subconscious Mind ...

The Knowing and Longing that Sparks a new beginning to continue the journey within

Today I start a new day.

A new beginning

A new chapter

A reset

Renovation of myself to Get to the Depth of my Soul

To Let Go of old stories

Old characters who have been haunting me

Old memories that had traumatized me

Old incidents that had scarred me to lose trust on trusting

Release expectations of how a human should be where what they did had disappointed me or let me down

Acknowledge the pain, scars, hurt from all forms of betrayals, abuse, torture, unfairness, evil, inhumane abuse, cheatings, backstabbings, cruelty, words, actions of all sorts from all shades of human shadows & darkness

The day I stop my unconscious behaviour of drinking and sipping poison daily expecting the ones who handed me the poison to die

My soul had made a promise to itself to come to this world to experience the depths and breath and polarities of being human, To learn lessons to Love despite the Hate, To Be Grateful despite the Disappointments, To be Appreciative despite the Downfalls, To Breakthrough Amidst the Breakdowns, To Turn Pain to Power, To Turn Mess to Message, ToDevelop Strength from Weakness, To Surrender in IronClad of Control, To Brave Through Fear, To Rise from Burnt Ashes to Phoenix, ToAllow Seeds of Well Meaning Intentions to Grow, To Remember the Wordly experience is but a play of Illusions and what is Real is the Source of it All

Source a Space of Stillness

Of Nothingness

Of Absolute Power

Of Sovereignty

Of No Beginning nor End

Of No Creation nor Destruction

Of Everything Expressed Yet Nothing Ever Imagined or Seen is It

There is No Other Power but It

To It I come, to It I Return

There is Only It

It is Everything

Owner of this Soul merged with an Ego Identity that Insists on Denying It's Existence, that on separation of itself and everything it is is Hell, Union of Everything is Heavenly Bliss, Acknowledging the Power so Be it Shall Be

The Power to FLY

To Love oneself is to Know oneself

To Know oneself is to Learn Discover and Understand the Various Parts of Self

To Learn there is the

Physical Body and it's Systems, Organs & Cells

There is an Emotional Body, of Senses, Feelings Emotions of Varying Depths Degree like Shadows of Varying Shades

There is a Thinking Body, of Mind Intellect, Thoughts, derived from memory, what is learnt, conditioned, repeated, imbedded from the one who beats this self in womb, raises the self, known as parents, the people that ecosystem around known as siblings family relatives,

the systems surrounding the self, the neighbourhood, area, city, country and everything that influences it the institution called school , the people in that instituition, the governing officials,policy makers, curriculum developers, principal teachers students, Culture, Religion & Faith, Belief Systems, common practices, rules, rights and wrongs DOs and DONTs,

All of the above taught conditioned rooted programmed from before born to the day the self is born raised amongst that person, family, culture, society, beliefs

Who self is now made up of all of that mix in varying levels of influence depending on the strength of it's imprint within the subset of each factors

For some in a family, the mother influences more than the father or the siblings or the relatives

For some the school influences more

For some the neighbourhood influences more

For some the country and it's politics influences more

For some Religion and it's doctrines influences more

For some tragedy, war, plague, disaster, political climate, religious domination, crime, internal tragedy, death, rape, incest, molest, sexual, physical, verbal , mental abuse, domestic violence, alcohol, drug, substance abuse, TV, Games, Computer, Mobile technology, Apps influences more

So who is a self but a mix of all of the above in varying degrees ....

All of the above is saved in the Subconscious mind and has become an auto pattern, auto behaviour one that is done repeatedly without questioning, various behaviours that are expressed due to the conditioned and programmed mind

Who is self?

A soul trapped in this cage walls prisons of everything it has been born and raised to believe as

True

The self is defined now by an ego, a mind, thoughts, beliefs, behaviours patterns identities roles set to stubbornly insist that the only way to be is what has been programmed to be

Soul is hidden underneath all of these programmed identities

Mind Thoughts

Body Foods

Ego Identities

Religion is then just a belief of what someone or a group of someone has said or told or programmed or trained you about God

Spirituality is then a journey of experiencing God

Who is self Minus all of these Programmed in Memory Thoughts, Systems, Beliefs, Identities?

The Detachment Discovery begins .....

Not many walk this road less travelled

Journey most often initiated by Conflicts, Crisis and Pain

Sparked by a Question

Who am I?

Why am I here?

Where do I come from?

Where am I going?

Minus everything that has been programmed or taught, the deep quest to know a deeper answer beyond the veils of programmed knowledge based on the bias of memory & it's co factors

The courage to Ask to Question is the beginning of it all

It begins with a Question

To stand up and desire to walk out of this enclosed prison, this wall, this box

To realise the door to this cage prison is unlocked ...

The courage to push that door and step out to seek to FLY

Which is why in many or those subsets of culture, beliefs, systems Fear is instilled to prevent one from ever asking

Do NOT question beyond this point or else _________

Politics and Religion used as Key Instruments to instil fear so one shall never embark on that Journey

The Dumbing down begins

Self is know lived based on what is set of Values Systems Dished in a plate

The Journey begins when one questions pushed to the edge of madness and insanity of not understanding the twisted plots of life

Crisis conflicts Pain

Further dumbed down by labels of depression of mental health, numbed by a cocktail of prescription drugs to further make the self docile and pause or stop from this pursuit

Pain Conflict Challenges self to dig deeper

To begin the process of detachment

Is to acknowledge the pain for what it is

Not defined by labels : You feel this way so you are a psychotic, you are this so you are bipolar etc etc

Labels are just that labels

What it is is what it is

Pain is Pain

Thoughts are Thoughts

Emotions are Emotions

It is what it is

Acknowledging Pain Thoughts Emotions for what it is

Is the 1st step of discovering the self

Ah so this is me

I have thoughts, feelings, emotions

I am not crazy

I am OK being Not Ok

I am not judged for feeling, thinking this or that way

Its like opening the mind allowing it to vomit it's train of thoughts and then flush it, it's gone just another dump of thoughts

It's like opening the emotional box and expressing it for what it is, tears, voice of expression, of pain, grief, sorrow, frustrations, anger, hatred, every pain named or unnamed in all shades of it's pain, allowing it to express itself for what it is : the buffet of pain

It is what it is

Labelling it yet not judging it

Not being wronged or faulted or deemed crazy or emotional for experiencing it

That after it all

It is OK for not feeling or being ok

So the Journey begins

To Know and Discover Self

To be Continued in the Book ....

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